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Journal - 16/10/01
(Written in black on gray for easier reading???)
Sometimes it's not so easy to do what the world expects of you; sometimes it's not so easy even to think in a straight line. This evening has been one of those times -- walking around in a foggy daze, my brain cells melted by too much education that I spent too much of other people's money on. My emotional mentality dysfunctional thanks to a huge mixture of feelings; from depression to the warm knowing that I am loved, stewing and rotting in my heart. Physical self ravaged by the sicknesses that prey upon the stressed and sleep deprived.
Almost too easy to let go and slip into the music euphoria. I change the musical track to 'Trying' by Lifehouse, I can feel myself slipping into the gorgeous splendor of the background guitar. Piano music... Oh God, have you ever created anything as hauntingly beauteous as the strains that echo from a grand piano? I must relearn to play that wondrous instrument again, if only to feed my soul upon the sounds that the crystallized rainbow of my inner self adores. No amount of ire or melancholy is enough to totally repel the sounds of truly well-played music.
But as tomorrow is my birthday there is much to do and the night only gets older.
~Heather